7days7authors

Monday - Tact - Jessica

Post to: megane
June 15, 2006
2:46 a.m.
Subject: Tact. Is it worth it?

How do you tell a guy you slept with that he was bad in bed? I mean, he went on for quite awhile about how he felt good, and how he thought he was good, and he hoped that I was “pleasured” as well. But it seems like he doesn’t remember me just laying there like a dead fish, making the odd “ooh” or “aah” noise when it seemed appropriate.

And he has a small penis.

Now how do you tell a guy that?

* * *

“You were gone awful fast the other night.”

I froze in my seat at the sound of his voice and tried to refrain from literally getting up and running away. “Yeah, I had a business meeting the next morning, so I skedaddled out of there. I was going to leave a note? But I couldn’t find anything to write with. Or on.” I swallowed and faked a smile. I wanted to curse the girls for choosing this bar to meet up at.

At the same time I really wanted to turn to the man and say, “You left me hanging the other night, mister! I wasn’t even close and to make matters worse, you were SMALL.” But I didn’t; I didn’t think that a bar was a good place to come out and say, “You’re horrible in bed and you have a small penis, go be a skeeze somewhere else.”

The guy (we’ll call him M), leered at me. “You wanna give it another go? I have time tonight. I had such a great time. We can go right now if you want.”

I glanced at my cell phone and faked surprise at the time. I got up from my seat at the bar and gathered my things. “I’ve gotta go! I’m meeting my friends at another bar. I’ll call you? Bye!” I left in a hurry (again) to escape M and his leers and suggestive remarks. As soon as I was out on the street, I called Alexis.

“Why did you pick that bar? M is there! That is his bar, where he goes after work!”

“Which one is M?” she asked. “And where are you?”

“M is the one who was really, really, really bad in bed and had a small penis!” I looked up and down the street for a taxi, but there were none to be found. “I’m a block down from the bar, and I’m headed to Ambrosia. Meet me there, and spread the word to the other girls.”

I snapped my cell phone shut and finally flagged down a taxi and told the driver the address of Ambrosia, thankful to be heading to a safe haven.

*** 

(Wow, sorry this isn’t up until 11:30 EST; busy day today. This is an excerpt from something I’ve been working on for a while now and it’s just starting to take shape.)